Levi Pilot Pilsner, a direct descendant of the Bohemian farmers who invented beer, was born in Whitingham, Vermont, in 1814. Little is known of his early life, but he evidently showed an aptitude for writing, speaking, and persuasion from a young age. By 1840, he had decided to travel west to Kansas Territory in hopes of "reading the law" with a view to obtaining the plum position of territorial in-house counsel with the New England Emigrant Aid Company, which was opening new branches in Lawrence, Manhattan, Topeka, and Osawatomie. However, upon reaching the burgeoning Missouri border town of West Port, Pilsner (a shrewd entrepreneur) realized there was a handsome profit to be made from outfitting the multitude of twenty-somethings who had decided to stay and rent chambers in the town instead of heading west to Santa Fe or Oregon with their parents. He therefore opened a storefront purveying essentials such as plastic-rimmed glasses, fixed-gear bicycles, and waxed-canvas messenger bags.
By the early 1900's, Pilsner had enough success through his merchandising to begin to diversify his pursuits. He partnered with J.M. Beaumont to open a dance hall in West Port that brought in acts popular with the cowboys and townfolk alike. He also drew on his family history to start a small brewing franchise along Armour Boulevard, which later relocated and become one of the country's premier microbreweries.
In 1918, Pilsner decided the time for retirement had come. He opted to move across the state line to the village of Prairie, where he set the record for successful culling of the ultramarine-colored moose that were indigenous to the area. His home and lodge later became successful commercial dining establishments.
Little is known of Pilsner's later years, but it is rumored he was instrumental in the formation of a new American football league and in the granting of a major league baseball expansion franchise to the Kansas City area. His current whereabouts are unknown.
(In reality, the title came from three objects sitting on the desk when this site was named: tags from a pair of Levi's vintage 501's, a Maratac pilot watch, and a bottle of Miller High Life. The words sounded good together and represented some of the topic areas for the site, so there you go.)
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